WELL THAT KINDA SUCKED

Friday, weeeeeee, fun day, well as fun as it gets around here. BFF Amy, Chelsea and Chase came up. We had lunch at Chipotle (my new fav) then just hung out for a while. Thanks peeps for coming to see us. We love company! Yesterday, weeeeeeeee, fun day, got Colby outside for the 1st time since we've been here. Then today was a total pisser :-(  The ex came up and started his trach education/training. Actually he did pretty good. He has to watch a trach change before he can do one. So the plan was for me to do my 2nd trach change, have him watch, then he can come up through the week and do his 1st. We were just trucking along, everything was dandy. I had done Colby's IPV and cough treatments by myself this morning, was feeling pretty darn confident. Had all my trach supplies lined up. Easy peasy, just like the 1st trach change, right? WRONG, VERY WRONG. Hell no it didn't go that way. I couldn't get the trach in, it just wouldn't glide in the way it's supposed to. So the nurse starts bagging Colby and we get another RT in to help. She couldn't get the trach to go in either. Then another RT comes in and she was able to get a size smaller trach into Colby's stoma. So there you have it, our 1st emergency situation with Colby and his trach. Luckily I didn't panic, and the nurse was excellent. Colby's oxygen only dropped to 78/77 and considering he had NOTHING in his airway to help him breathe, she did a great job bagging him. We're not really sure what happened, could be a number of things. He could have had a mucous plug that was preventing the trach from gliding in. He could have tissue that isn't healing properly. Hard to say. They're going to leave the smaller trach in for today/tonight. There has been enough trauma to Colby's airway today, thank you very much. Then in rounds tomorrow we'll talk about what to do next and when we can try and change Colby's trach again. Yep, that's my sweet boy, keeping it interesting here in the TCC.

Not much else going on today. It's such beautiful weather I wish we could get Colby outside. But I think he's been through enough today so that will have to wait a bit. The GOOD NEWS is that Colby took a 45-minute window off the vent this morning before all that other crap happened. WAY TO GO COLBY, YOU AWESOMELY AWESOME KIDDO! I'm going to focus on that instead of the bump we hit with the trach change today. However, I will say this. It doesn't matter how many times you see it, how many years you've dealt with it, you never, ever, never get used to watching your kid struggle to breathe. When that oxygen monitor turns red and starts to beep, and the color drains out of Colby's face, there is a feeling that sits in the pit of your stomach that's hard to explain. You have to experience it to know what I'm talking about. Just like I wouldn't know what it's like to watch a kid have a seizure or go through chemo. You have to live it to know it, and trust me, you don't want to know what I know. All I can think is, he's okay. They said I did everything right. Nothing I did caused Colby's airway to collapse, close, etc. It was (hopefully) just a freak thing and the next trach change we have will be smooooooooth sailing. If not, somebody's going to have to make a road trip to Cincy and bring me one of those large mocha, valium, Xanax, vodka, caramel, rum lattes! Make it an extra large! And a dozen Krispy Kremes and a gallon of Ben and Jerry's. Hope it doesn't come to that, but just in case, who's volunteering?!

I went for a nice long walk. Now I'm at Ronnie Donnie. Going to eat supper, then head back to see kid. Mom is here with us now. Not sure which one of us is staying with Colby and which one is staying at Ronnie Donnie. Wanted to keep everyone posted on our excitement for the day! Here's hoping to no more exciting trach changes, only UNEVENTFUL ones. Tomorrow will be a better day, because I said so dammit, that's why!! Adios for now.